The Latest from The Onion? Shockingly No

I was minding my own business today when I thought I had received the latest from The Onion in my email. It was a piece asking me to subscribe to a magazine dedicated to providing an "in depth" report on Sarah Palin's conservative record and then urging me to buy a book called: "Sarah: How a Hockey Mom Turned Alaska's Political Establishment Upside Down." I read on - waiting for the punchline - only to be horrified that the email was not intended to be funny. Some lunatic - Jonathan Garthwaite - actually created a magazine dedicated to exploring Sarah Palin's record and an even bigger lunatic - Kaylene Johnson - actually wrote a book about her. While I have time to read both sides of the index card on which Palin's "extensive" record is recounted and even to read the no doubt 100-page long, quadruple spaced, 36 point font book, I am stupified that anyone would take so much time to extol the virtues of someone so unqualified and inappropriate for the job. While blindly right wing types might persist in lying to themselves, I don't want a Hockey Mom running the country. I don't someone who hasn't left the country representing us with heads of state. I don't want someone afraid to hold a press conference or to release her finances (before her debate with Sen Biden) or to talk without a teleprompter to be my a second-in-command. C'mon folks, let's be real. The choice of Palin should disqualify McCain from being our President.

And while we are talking about McCain, what's the deal with his calling off the debate and shutting down his campaign? Can you say panic? Obama is right - Presidents need to be able to multi-task. The truth is that McCain realized he knew nothing about economics (other than helping to cover up failed savings and loans) and knew he was over matched in the debate, and ducked it. Is this the guy we need and want as our President? Is this the sort of guy who'll be able to make reasoned and reasonable decisions? Is this the guy we want in charge of our armed forces and nuclear arsenals? In a word (or 3): NOT A CHANCE.

To close this little rant, I thought I'd steal something that Mr. Adams shared with me. David Letterman's views on Sen. McCain - who lied to him as well saying he couldn't do his show because he had to rush off to Washington to "save" the country:

Fun with NFL Sportscasters

If you are like me, you like nothing more than when ex-jocks and "professional" sportscasters put their feet in their mouths or when these allegedly affable types show their true nasty colors when none of us are looking or when they exhibit holier than thou attitudes. Here is a selection of some of my favorites beginning with Dan "Better Switch to De-Caf" Marino:

The there's our favorite non-word"Smith," Emmitt "Gotta Love that University of Florida Education" Smith:



Here's our friend Joe "Holier Than Thou, I'll Never Be Half as Good as My Father" Buck, making himself look ridiculous by making something out of absolutely NOTHING:



Here's a two-for: The ever obnoxious Jim Rome and the overreacting, lunatic Jim "Cris" Everett:



Or, how about fake Mr. Nice Guy, Chris "I'm really an asshole" Berman - how'd you like to work with that complete tool?